****This post contains affiliated links DISCLAIMER
There are so many methods, tips and opinions floating around out there surrounding the topic of sleep training. I was overwhelmed by information overload and people telling me what they did and what not to do!
When I found out that I was pregnant two weeks before we were to fly to AZ to meet our son, I was filled with a lot of emotions! I wondered how in the hell was I going to do this!!
I was determined to have James sleep trained before Madison’s arrival and I had 7 months to do it! I started sleep training James at 4 weeks and Madison at 3 months (it took a while to get into the swing of things with two babies under the age of 1!)
I didn’t really follow one specific method, I bounced around to find what worked best for James, and then later Madison. These are just tips and I am just a mother that had success through these methods.
Routine & Schedule
It is never too late to start a routine and having a schedule for your family. It not only helps children but parents as well. Children thrive in repetitive settings, it is how they learn best. By having a daily routine, they learn what to expect. Having a routine has helped me understand my children’s behavior, moods and developmental signs. It has also helped me organize and plan my day/evenings.
- Morning Routine
- Wake up
- Cuddle
- Breakfast (baby food or bottle)
- Play time
- Nap
- Afternoon Routine
- Lunch
- Story time
- Show time
- Playtime
- Snack
- Nap
- Night Routine
- Dinner
- Bath Time
- Turn lights off, turn on soft low light lamp
- Story time with snack
- Turn on music and say prayers
- Bedtime
Repetition
James is now 14 months and Madison is 7 months. James sleeps 12-14 hours a night and Madison sleeps 10-12.
Repetition goes hand in hand with routine. James and Madison both, at the age of 7 months, knew what their sleeping music meant, what their bath time meant, what story-time meant and were able to associate all of these things with sleeping because we do those things everyday as a part of our routine, REPEATEDLY.
“Training”
Like I said before, there are A LOT of different books, articles, tips, suggestions and opinions out there about how to get your child to sleep through the night. I was overwhelmed and had no clue which one would work best for James and ended up just taking a few things that I liked from each method and creating a system that worked for both of my babies.
- No Tears Method: If your baby has a preference on how they fall asleep (rocking, feeding, etc) slowly do these things less so that your baby isn’t dependent on those things to fall asleep.
- At first, both of my babies wanted to be rocked and patted on the bottom with a bottle. After reading how if you want your baby to become an independent sleep (able to self soothe and get to sleep on their own), we started do those things around bedtime and not directly before.
- Cry it out Method: Allowing your baby to cry and eventually self soothing themselves.
- We did this method to an extent. We did the 3 minute cry (not letting a baby cry longer than 3 minutes) After 3 minutes, I would go in, not taking the baby out of the crib, talking or interrupting. I would calmly place the baby in the right sleeping position if they were moved and rub their back. Not taking the baby out of their crib is very important. They associate being taken out as getting to wake up and this stimulates them making it harder to get them to sleep.
- Weissbluth Method: This method is basically making sure you have a bedtime routine which I am 100% on board with.
- We have a pretty strict sleep routine for nap and bedtime. Make a routine that works for you and your family’s schedule.
- Ferber Method:This method is like the crying it out method where you put your baby in their crib crying or not and then when you check on them you don’t pick them up out of their bed and soothe them without stimulating them.
- The only key that we took from this method was not stimulating the baby or removing them from their bed. When they are crying we make soothing sounds, we don’t talk. We pat their bottoms or rub their backs and we try not to stimulate them.
- Chair Method: Basically you sit next to your child’s bed and slowly move your way out of the room.
- I would sit on the ground next to the crib and slowly make my way out of the room. Some nights (teething time) I would sometimes have to sleep next to the crib for a while, but I never removed the babies from their bed and I never interacted with them.
Our Sleep Training Method
Tips on how we got our babies to self sooth and sleep 12 hours
- Bedtime Routine: No matter how old our babies were, we immediately started a bedtime routine
- Dinner
- Bath Time
- Turn lights off, turn on soft low light lamp
- Story time with snack
- Turn on music and say prayers
- Bedtime
- Environment: Make sure that the area that your baby is sleeping in is safe, comfortable and soothing. Rooms that are dark, firm mattress, white noise, cool mist humidifier, ceiling fan, etc., these are all things that can create a better sleeping environment for your little one.
- Feeding: If your baby needs to feed/nurse, rock or be patted to go to sleep, continue to do those things just gradually ease out of using those as a dependency.
- EXAMPLE: We stopped giving the bottle directly before bed. We instead gave them the bottle then did bath time or read a story.
- EXAMPLE: Instead of rocking them we started walking them around the room and then they gradually didn’t need to be swayed or rocked.
- Babies under 6 months
- When your baby is getting up every two to three hours to eat, feed them and then place them back in their bed without any stimulation (talking, singing, playing, etc.)
- If your baby wakes in the night and you know that they are not hungry or have a poopy diaper, wait 3 minutes and then try soothing them by gently and quietly rubbing their back or belly or pat their bottom while they are still laying in their crib. Refrain from picking them up. Try not to stimulate them by turning on the lights or talking. When they stop crying leave the room. If they start crying again, wait 3 minutes and repeat.
- Babies 6 months or older
- Sleep training babies 6 months and older can be a little more difficult because at this point they are more mobile in the crib and they begin to notice mommy and daddy leaving the room.
- (SAME) If your baby wakes in the night and you know that they are not hungry or have a poopy diaper, wait 3 minutes and then try soothing them by gently and quietly by rubbing their back or belly or pat their bottom while they are still laying in their crib. Refrain from picking them up. Try not to stimulate them by turning on the lights or talking. When they stop crying leave the room. If they start crying again, wait 3 minutes and repeat.
- If your little one is having a hard time giving up feedings slowly lessen the amount you give. If they are getting 8 oz lower the amount to 7 oz the next night, then 6 oz and so forth. They will eventually understand they are not hungry and won’t wake for feedings.
- If your baby is not calming down from quiet soothing, try sitting on the floor next to their crib and making calming sounds or shhh’ing. Let them know that you are in the room but try to refrain from removing them from their cribs.
Don’t Give Up!
There were SEVERAL nights (too many to count) where I would take my pillow and curl up on the ground next to James’s crib…9 months pregnant.
There were SEVERAL nights of tears, no sleep, babies cries, shhhh’ing and defeat.
If you are a stay at home mom, start using sleep training methods during the day during nap!
OUR NIGHT TIME MUST HAVES
These are our MUST HAVE products that help soothe our little ones and help them get ready for bedtime! My children are polar opposites, but by combining these products with a routine, both sleep through the night for AT LEAST 12 hours!!!
Mama Bear Finance says
Thanks for these advice! Getting my baby to sleep 12 hours straight really help with my sanity. I tried the ‘cry it out’ method and though it was difficult in the beginning, it’s necessary for our daughter to disassociate crying with getting our attention. But it’s really not easy especially in the beginning. It’s gotten a lot better now.
onehaleofamom.com says
My youngest son did the same thing! The 3 minute rule helped me with my mom guilt. I didn’t want to rush in immediately when he started crying but I also didn’t want him to cry all night! By giving him three minutes, he knew that I was just outside the door but that I wasn’t going to get him out of his bed. Every three minutes I would go in lay him back on his back and then step out after he stopped crying. Eventually he self soothed under 30 seconds and I no longer had to go in his room. It is HARD, but staying consistent shows rewarding results! Good Luck!